Work-life Balance ..

Recently, this has becomes a favorite topic of discussion in Indian news media with some of the leaders touting for 80-100 hr work weeks, calling it a necessary to keep our momentum of growth to becoming a developed nation. Having grown up in that country, work is prioritized over everything else one has. As a young professional, I was made to understand that leaving office before 7pm (when others are still working or boss is still at work) was considered inappropriate. The very next day, I have experienced work being assigned that would make one toil. So, there would always be a guilty feeling and need to apologize multiple times, if one had to leave bit early from office (for some personal work). Working hard and long hours (including weekends) was celebrated, recognized and eulogized. One would be compared to peers and someone who slogged longer would be eligible for promotion (over someone who prioritized other personal activities). 

Fast forward in consulting days, I would be required to work for multiple clients and stakeholders at the same time, and having to multi-task on competing priorities and deadlines, I would end up working late in the night and over weekends - affecting family life, sleep, food and sleep habits. For example, even though I would be very sick or have a sick kid at home, I would somehow manage to go to work (as being absent would send wrong signals). Even if one went on PTO, we had to justify the reason (as flimsy causes would be considered bad for career growth).  

It would be very hard juggling long work hours and family.  All of this created bad habits in me with odd sleep hours, binge eating, bad posture or not exercising enough. As age caught up on me, I started realizing that its high time that I need to focus on my own persona care and well-being. I'm so grateful that my current organization provided so many tools and avenues for employees to have a meaningful life and still make big impact at workplace. 

To start with, after being in the IT industry for over 2 decades, I experienced first hand the joy when company declared a short Summer and a Winter vacation for employees. It was just so refreshing to not have to think about work and when everyone in the office is vacationing, there is no lingering feeling of missing out. Secondly, when there are webinars organized in the organization on mental health, energy for purpose, step-up challenge and various health topics to glean essential wisdom and make lifestyle changes, you feel motivated that others at your work place learn the need to prioritize their personal life, health, career and work. So, last few years I've been on a journey to find that balance, changing age-old habits, adapting new ways to do things so that I can be more effective in the long run.

A good definition of Work-life balance - "managing your time and energy in a way that leaves you feeling fulfilled and engaged as a whole being". How does one show up with their best self and avoid mental exhaustion? So, if one has never been on a routine of personal growth and transformation, it can be quite overwhelming at first to understand one-self, have self-awareness of what one likes and not and building structure and routine around that. Then work on it consistently to see some kind of a result. It is often easy to lose motivation and say old ways were better or may be I'm wasting time. One needs to belief and work on oneself with integrity to build that strong muscle and habit to continuously improve. When it comes to personal well-being, there is never a good day to start. Everyday is important and one needs to set those personal goals and overcome procrastination to make it their life mission. You got to not just do it alone, but involve your family kids and parents. For example, how many times I have neglected my sleep over a deliverable or a deadline - probably trying to impress. At times, giving in to pressure from higher management. I woke up one day to realize that no one really cares to what happens to your personally. When you deprioritize personal care, mental exhaustion and burnout, you are taking your life to a point of no return. I feel blessed to have leadership in my organization to set examples and talk about this topic exhaustively which shows how much they care for the employees.

Here are some rules for someone who wants to take that first step or effort towards work-life balance:

• Learn to say "no" - One needs to prioritize one-self on a daily basis and take decisions on what to do and what not to do. So, learning to say "no" to somethings to get time for the "yes" things is probably the very first step towards healthy w-l balance.
• Define routines - a morning routine of getting up same time, exercise, meditation, day routine to eat on time and an evening routine of journaling, reading, sleeping on time can reduce stress and anxiety in a big way.
• Create boundaries and don't compromise - This is a big one and as life evolves, one will have more responsibilities at home and work. I was inspired by what our Chief Revenue Officer (who travels a lot and need to be at events and parties till late at night) said that he retires from all such places by 9 pm. He has created that boundary for himself and sticks to it (no matter what). How many times have we let go and said - this one time and keep pushing those boundaries? 
• Create intentional breaks during day -  I was inspired by one of our team members who would take a 5 minute break between meetings to do quick push-ups or sit-ups or some breathing exercises before jumping back to work. In the past, I have seen colleagues taking mid-day breaks and going for a walk or run around noon (also getting the much needed sunshine).
• Take lunch away from monitor/phone - Since pandemic and work from home became a norm and people work across different timezones, they book time whenever it suits. So, one needs to block that 30-45 min to focus on mindful heating a good lunch or socializing with someone over checking into another work item or phone.
• Have compassion for oneself -   This is a big one. I was taught to toil really hard and push myself to achieve goals. So, late nights - early mornings, filling every waking hour with some activity to reach those milestones, one to everything that you worked for can crumble any moment like shattering of a mirror. So, learnt it the very hard way to listen to what your body says or feels. So, loving oneself, engaging in activities that relax and energize oneself is crucial.
• Do not apologize -  In the past, I had to apologize so many times for not coming to work for being sick. But I now know better - one should never apologize for prioritizing one's need - whether to take care of a family member or attending a school program for kids. 
• Network with like-minded people -  Today with the advent of social media, there are lot of people who are doing good work to help others in their life journey by sharing their own. Listening to their stories and networking with like minded people help keep accountability and ability to overcome procrastination and imbibe good habits. Investing in people and relationships that provide unconditional support. 
• Asking for help -   In spite of everything, one can go wrong. So, having a mentor, guide and coach to talk and discuss with or reaching out for help, is always a good way to bring harmony to one's life and meaning.
           

As they say, work will occupy large part of one's life and one should make it a journey rather than a "dead"-line. It is important we bring our very best self everyday by sprinkling love, humor, health, relationships and feeling whole and brimming with energy and enthusiasm by prioritizing oneself!